The struggle against lameness

A lot of people have been coming up to me lately to ask me questions about the various things in life that people to tend to ask questions about and usually the following dialog takes place:

Person: Hey Matt, you're like an academic all-star now, how do you fight lameness.

Me:Lameness has never really been a problem for me, person. [Though I don't say person I usually say the person's real name, or buddy, or champ, or duder]

Person: Yeah but you spend like all your time in the law school, and most of the that time is in the library reading. How come I never see you killing dudes in the World of Warcraft, or reading comic books, or hanging out at the club wearing a sweater and not talking to girls any more.

Me: Look, I'm still known to be one of the baddest druids on the Forgotten Coast, I can tell you all about Batman and his aglets, and I was totally not meeting girls downtown this very week. So I don't see the problem.

Person: That's not what I heard from our mutual friend. [The person will say the name of the mutual friend and not "mutual friend" here.] Mutual Friend says you're a lame-ceratops.

Me: Damn.

This conversation happens constantly. And I need to point out that when I say "damn" its not because I'm angry or anything, its the only thing that can escape my mouth after getting hit with knowledge and truth so deep. Like at the end of that Eminem song, "Stan." He says "Damn" the same way I say "Damn." So please don't get it confused with an angry "Damn" or even a Rudy Ray Moore (RIP) Dolomite "Damn."